When Did Kid’s Birthdays Become So Much Work?
It’s a month to Lauren’s fourth birthday and she is asking for the whole do. She wants a rainbow cake (I don’t even know where she knew about the existence of rainbow cake because we sure haven’t bought her one), a party at her preschool and goodie bags for her classmates.
I know what she asks for isn’t too much. Time has changed and kids these days are used to big celebrations. Almost all mothers I know are stressing out over party planning months before the big day. Securing a party venue, working on an Instagram-worthy party decor, and a jaw-dropping cake are a few of the must-haves these days. It’s no longer surprising to see jumping castles, petting zoos, some unicorns and a hired magician or a clown or a face-painter or all of the above at parties anymore.
How did kids birthday parties spiral so out of control? What happens to good old home cooked dinner with favourite dishes with a simple cake for dessert? I’m sure it didn’t start with the kids. I don’t remember ever complaining to my parents about not getting a themed party.
In fact, the only ‘birthday party’ I ever had was when I was 8 and I invited one friend to my house, ONE! It’s rather special though because I received a book as a birthday present from my friend. My first ever birthday present from someone who isn’t family.
Back then, the expectation was that everyone had their birthday parties at home. The rich kids had their parties at McDonald with a playground. That’s that. Were we deprived? Were we less happy at birthday parties? I certainly didn’t think so.
Nick jokingly commented that Lauren will be those girls who are upset with boyfriends for not remembering their birthdays. It hit me like a brick. By treating birthday like it’s such a huge deal now, aren’t we essentially raising high-maintenance kids who wouldn’t settle for less when they become adults? If they get unicorns and mermaids at their 4 years’ old party, where can we go from here?
As much as I’d like to tell you I’m ignoring her wishes and celebrate her birthday quietly at home, I think I’m going to cave. Because every single classmate of hers has their birthday celebration in school and I don’t want her to feel like she isn’t special enough to have something similar. I hope this trend of celebrating birthdays in preschool stops by the time they reach primary school.
And we could get back to small and intimate birthday parties. I promise I would not get lost in the business of kid’s birthday parties. I promise our parties will be simple and easy. The kids will play happily with their friends and the adults will laugh and truly get to know each other. I would not be a stressed out host who doesn’t know her kid’s friends’ parents.
Let’s bring back simple birthday parties. It’s a time to celebrate milestones and togetherness as a family and let’s not detract from that.
HELLO! I’M MICHELLE.
Find out more about me here.
This and so much so my youngest turned 4 and he’s not yet had a birthday party. My eldest has had one every year but Xander never wanted one and we celebrate as a family, this year my bestie and her kids and husband joined us at Diggerland which was so fun and then on Xander’s actual birthday we went to his favourite museum. Utterly perfect x
There’s a Diggerland equivalent here in Singapore too! I bet Xander had lots of fun there and at the museum. Birthday outings are great. Memorable, without all the planning and cleaning up afterwards! 🙂
Oh my… we are in the same boat n must be born in the same era!!! I only had 1 birthday party n I so remember rich kids having bday parties in McD’s!
My 2 kids haven’t had any big elaborate birthday celebrations only intimate ones with family! The eldest, we celebrated at her playgroup…
Jamie Chaw,
http://karmie080808.blogspot.sg/
Birthdays… My little one is only a baby but I am not sure i am looking forward to that. Having to invit all the family and pretend I am a gorgeous housewife with the most amzing cake ever… Will probably order all the food and pretend I cooked all day LOL #FridayFrolics
I did a big party when my eldest was 4. He got so many crayons and paints as gifts I could have opened my won craft store! Thanks for linking up to #FridayFrolics. Please can you add the badge to your post.
Yes, here is to keeping parties simple! They get so over the top don’t they!? #FridayFrolics
Ya so true… any party should be fun and easy for parents as well kids…I believe in and do simple celebrations for my family.
Very true… simple is bliss! Birthday is all about spending time with loved ones.
I think this is very much to do with peer pressure, both at the children’s end as much as the parent’s end. Many parents feel that it is once-a-year celebration, and with just one or two kids in the house, they tend to want to splurge to make it “memorable”. (This is also why I have business at Hello Lobang lolol)
What I feel is.. people should spend within their means and not push for anything too unattainable and hurts the pockets. If a simple meal with people close to you is the way to go, then go for it!
You are right. Definitely spend within our means and time available.
For us we love to celebrate as a family and planning a trip or holiday together. Out birthday party with invitation is once in a while.
I think a birthday trip locally is fine because overseas trip for birthday can get expensive, especially when you have multiple kids! 🙂
Haha, every kids will “demand” their own party, even after they go P1
It is a lot of effort to plan for a party.
cheers, Andy
(SengkangBabies.com)
I remember those days when my birthdays were cooked by family and just a cake from Bengawan Solo. These days, it’s all the fanciful 3 tier cakes. I have also been trying to keep things simple these days with dinners with only immediate families.
Really? Oh no! *Face palm*. Sorry, I think they will have to make do with small intimate celebration with immediate family members only by then.
We still have simple birthday parties at our home 🙂 Other than celebrating with kids at her preschool last time (didn’t even do it when she went to primary school oops), I’ve never organised a party for Lil Pumpkin and her friends… mainly because I’m so lazy hehe. Not that she minded 😛
Ai @
Sakura Haruka
Always believed that the simple things in life are often the best -focusing on the significance of the event. Kids in Singapore are quite blessed to even have parents and families to celebrate their birthday and that’s whats important. Thanks for sharing.
You are right. We are really blessed to even have the options 🙂
I know! I haven’t even tried a party for my kids yet – will when school age if they want one. But it seems like so much stress these days and they don’t actually care as yet! I had birthday parties some years when I was a young kid. It wasn’t themed decorations and elaborate rides like many are now though. Just party food and games and dancing, which is plenty of fun when you’re six!
Thanks so much for joining us on #FridayFrolics. Hope to see you next time.
You’re so right! It must have started with the moms! I was just talking about my sons 1st birthday party that’s coming up and was looking at Pinterest thinking, “am I really going to have time to do this?!” Maybe it is Pinterests fault? Lol Thanks for your honesty and sharing with #StayClassyMama!
Pinterest certainly plays a part. I’m guilty too. It’s so tempting to pin those beautiful party photos, thinking “maybe someday”. Good luck for your son’s 1st birthday party!